Yesterday was the first time I used a Matte Knife. Maybe using it to cut one sheet of paper...one time wouldn't be so hard, but 50 pieces, each 4 by 5 inches, was kind of difficult. It is for my first Surface Research Project. I tried really hard, really I did, some pieces are a skew but I attempted to straighten them out the best that I can. For a first time, I am quite proud of myself. It took longer than expected (three hours), but I am satisfied with my work.
At my high school, my art teacher had a huge Xacto cutting board and whenever I needed a piece of paper to be cut I just go:
"Can you cut this paper for me?"
"Sure."
No work for me and no need for me to go near sharp objects. However, here I am on my own with this. The original size of the paper I cut was 14 by 17 inches. The limited cutting surface in my dorm room and me messing up a lot contributed to my struggles.
It's not good to get used to certain things sometimes. Comforts, I mean. They can go away. Not everything is permanent. In this case, I graduated from my high school, thus leaving my art teacher who had an huge Xacto cutting board. My tendency to rely on him to cut my paper or stretch canvas cannot be done now. I have to leave the nest. I have to leave my own pride. I have to break away from the herd.
In a less dramatic statement, I have to be responsible now.
Relying on yourself is an important skill. I admire people who are independent:
Like Bruce Lee who came to America at a young age...or my own mother went to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia by herself and remained by herself for 4 years.
I am off on my own in a foreign place. It is hard being away from home. I know that I am not the only one feeling this way though. There are those who live further than me and are here. The international students probably have it the hardest. I hope they are adjusting well.
If Bruce Lee can do it, so can I. (This is me giving myself a boost of confidence)
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